Si Disiplina o Si Ligaya

It is really getting harder and harder figuring out what to write next. Fortunately, a news clip from "24 oras" gave me an idea. They were showing a video of some poor Filipino families frolicking on Manila Bay, even though it was already prohibited by the authorities. You can also see cottages being built on the shore for rental. Ironically, there were also coast guards seen in the video seemingly unfazed by the whole thing. They do have a pretty tough job. How would they tell these people to pack-up and leave? They're not exactly hurting anyone or doing any crime per se, besides, the only reason why the ordinance was implemented is because the government wants to "protect" the people's health and well being... and the country's image too, I guess. Bale kung ikaw si mamang coast guard, na alam naman natin na mahirap din, pano mo sasabihin sa mga kapwa mo mahihirap na umalis.

Mamang guard na inassume kong mahirap din: "Huy guys, wag naman kayo dito, please naman o, wag na kayo magsaya, wala kayong karapatang lumigaya kasi wala naman kayong pera para bumili ng happiness. 

Mahirap na manginginom sa beach: "Kuys sandali lang kami, ok lang naman na magkasakit kami, hindi naman kayo bibili ng gamot namin diba? dito lang kasi kami makapag swimming ng libre. Pls pls pls.

Mamang guard na inassume kong mahirap din: K.

This is how I imagine the conversation will end up to. Lahat naman kasi nadadaan sa malinaw na pakiusapan. Close kasi lahat ng mga Pilipino. Iba yung bonding moments natin, sanggang dikit, kapit tuko. Tipong: Huy baka pwede namang pasingit sa pila. Kuya baka pwede namang pagusapan to o, 200 lang dala ko e. Maleleyt lang po ng mga 12 hours, konting antay lang po. Salamat huh? Labyu all.

Wag natin i-confuse to sa Filipino hospitality. Kasi pag sinabing hospitality, pakiramdam ko purong positivity to e, isang kaugalian na naipapakita sa mainit na pagtanggap sa isang bisita. Pero itong tinutukoy ko, ang "pagbigyan mo na" o yung "hayaan mo na" mentality, mejo malabo. Kinukunsinti kasi nito yung mga kamalian na dapat ituwid sa kadahilanang malabo rin. Pinagbibigyan ba natin sila dahil kapwa naman nating Pinoy? o dahil sa awa? o marahil tinatamad lang talaga tayong maging pabida?

Either way, this habit is clearly a manifestation of our lack in discipline. There is no denying that we Filipinos are having a major problem in this area. Discipline is something that was not instilled in our culture as a nation. It seems like it was not a priority during our upbringing. 

There are many reasons why we're not disciplined as a nation. The lack of proper education is one. GMRC touched the surface of how to be a decent human being as you grow older, but school can only do so much. At the end of the day, it will still fall under the responsibility of your parents. How were you brought up by your parents? Did they even instill in you how important it is to behave properly in public? or are they too busy minding their own immaturity? We can say lack of discipline can be associated with poor upbringing, immaturity, and irresponsibility.

Sa bahay talaga nagsisimula yan e. Lumaki ka ba sa pamilyang palamura? Lagi ba silang nagbabangayan kahit may bata sa paligid? Nagyoyosi ba sila sa mukha mo? Nagiinom? Nagmamarijuana? 

If you did grow up in this environment, it is more likely you'll end up in the same manner. You'll probably embrace the same behavior, just because you have considered it normal as a kid, without realizing it's totally unconventional outside the comfort of your home. If this is the case, we might be able to understand where you're coming from. However, if you do realize as you grow older (assuming you have a mind of your own) that the only reason why you're the way you are, is because of how your classless parents raised you, then you are definitely an immature inbred.

Mahirap din kung sabagay disiplinahin ang mga nasanay na sa "skwater" na ugali, ika nga nila, you can't teach old dogs new tricks. Pero kung wala ka namang buntot at hindi ka naman kumakain ng sarili mong suka, baka pwede ka namang maging disenteng tao. 

Naalala ko nung bata pa ko, habang nakasakay sa auto namin na nakabukas yung bintana, nagtapon ako ng plastic cup na may lamang softdrinks sa labas. Tapos tinampal ako ng nanay ko at sinigawan ng matindi. Nagulat ako kasi pati yung tatay ko nagalit sakin. Pahiyang pahiya talaga ako nun sa sarili ko. Hinding hindi ko makakalimutan yun kasi, imbis na galit at tampo ang maramdaman ko sakanila, hiya ang nangibabaw sakin. Kahihiyan sa mistulang simpleng bagay, na akala ko "okay" lang at lagi ko namang nakikita sa lipunan. Tumatak sa isipan at sa kultura ko yun. At kahit kelan hindi ko na inulit yun. Tipong kahit gustong gusto ko nang itapon yung basura ko, hahawakan ko nalang muna.

Tapos punyeta yung kaharap mo sa jeep magtatapon nalang ng basta basta. Iniisip ko nalang na walang breeding yung magulang niya kaya ganun. Alam mo yun, ang hirap, kasi hindi natin ugali bilang Pilipino na manita ng kapwa. Hindi kagaya dito sa ibang bansa, pag me ginawa kang mali, sasabihin talaga nila sayo ng harapan. Tipong shit, kung Pinoy ka na salta sa ibang bansa, alam nyo tong sinasabi ko. Kung hindi pa, try mo, ng makatikim ka ng "stateside na disiplina".

Dito na papasok yung immaturity. Napatawad ko na yung sarili ko kasi bata pa naman ako nun. Inosente pa, bobo pa sa ugaling tama. Lagi kong ginagamit yung immaturity na term kapag may nakita akong mali na ginawa ng isang taong nasa tamang-edad na. Ang masama neto, talamak sa tropahan mo, sa pamilya mo o sa sarili mo ang kawalan ng disiplina dahil sa immaturity. Lagi kang may napapansin na ginawa nilang mali, na pwede namang gawing tama, kung bibigyan lang talaga ng effort. 

The way I see immaturity is how a person thinks only about himself and not think about how his decision will affect others. An immature person doesn't see the bigger picture. He does things just because he feels like he can do it and not think about the consequences. Discipline is not existent in this way of thinking. This person acts like a child, no remorse, no guilt whatsoever.

Yung kaibigan mong dura ng dura. Yung mga nagyoysi kahit bawal na nga. Yung mga mag te-take out ng palihim sa buffet. Yung mga magnanakaw ng ballpen sa bangko. Yung mga ayaw i-silent ang phone sa simbahan. Yung mga hindi nagaayus ng upuan sa restawran at mga babuy sa lamesa.

Yung mga taong mag kakalat at sasabihing "May mag-aayus naman nyan, trabaho nila yun e". Eto yung mga lagi nating naririnig na paliwanag. Mga taong wala sa tamang wisyo, mga walang pakialam. 

Yes it is true that someone will eventually clean your mess for you. It is true that it is actually a part of their job description. But you didn't have to make a mess in the first place. You didn't have to make their job harder than it already is. Your whole being is reduced to the way you think in this situation. It doesn't make you cool even if you believe otherwise. Hindi ka madiskarte, o maabilidad. Ignorante ka. You are a child and your future children shouldn't be proud of you. It is unfortunate that they have you as a parent. 

And if by any chance you decided to become a parent. It would be your responsibility to incorporate a sense of discipline in them as they grow up. Do not let your parents' inadequacy be your standard of good parenting. Give them the right foundation while you still can. So when they reached the right age, you will be the benchmark of values for them. They will grow up thinking they were raised by responsible parents. If they happen to meet shitty people along the way, just be confident that they'll do the right thing and mind your own business. haha Whatever they decide to be influenced by when they grow up is mainly their decision. One way or the other, I can assure you they will always remember at least one instance when you corrected their mistake.

Regardless of what caused your lack of discipline, I also believe that a firm, and a strict law should be enforced. Rules should always be instructed and should be followed by every one. A strong and an unforgiving leader could be a major turning point on how we Filipinos perceive discipline. 

Kung tumawid ka sa maling tawiran, pagbibiyan ka lang ba ni mamang opiser? Kung hindi mo hiniwalay ang nabubulok sa di nabubulok, kukunin parin ba ni kuyang basurero o hahayaang maimbak sa harapan ng bahay niyo? Kung itatapon mo ba yung basura sa ilog, itatapon ka din ba ng pulis sa ilog? 

Kung may isang lider na may kamay na bakal, kung may lider na magpaparusa sa mga hindi sumusunod, magiging chill pa ba ang pamumuhay natin? Lagi na ba tayong matatakot at ilag sa mga kilos natin paglabas ng bahay? Willing ba tayong i-compromise ang kaligayahan ng Pinoy para sa disiplinadong pamumuhay? Magiging masaya pa ba tayo kagaya ng mga batang naliligo sa Manila Bay?

The Pinoy Chill

"Work, work, work, work, work
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Work, work, work, work, work!
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Working in retail or a food establishment forces you to listen to the same fucking song over and over and OVER again, to the point where you can remember all the words, but for some reason this Rihanna song is just impossible to memorize. 
Listening to this song a thousand times yesterday made me wanna write about the Filipino work ethic, not the positive side of course, 'coz that would be rather biased.

I just wanna say before everything goes to THAT place, Filipinos are unbelievably hardworking... when they're out of the country that is. They work two-three jobs to earn as much as they can. And they actually do their jobs PROPERLY. They are efficient, fast, and productive. They are tolerable with any circumstances they're handed with and adaptable to the environment they're in. I am lucky to work in a store where there are several Filipinos 'coz it makes the job a lot easier. But these are Filipinos I met outside the Philippines. Outside where there is decent compensation. An income that gives you actual buying power. Something you can get savings from. Ipon na pang-inuman paguwe mo sa Pilipinas kasama ang mga tambay sa kanto. Kasi ayun naman ang purpose ng pag-abroad mo diba? Para lumigaya ng panandalian kasama ang mga taong wala namang ibang kailangan sayo kundi ang laman ng bulsa mo. Ang mga tambay ng lipunan. 

It is a growing problem in the country, it has always been. I don't really know what the root cause is, but I wanna say the lack of a decent education, I had to say decent 'coz I do understand that there are a lot of unemployed graduates, but come on, let's face it, we all know that not every one is actually ABLE. If you graduated from college and you still don't know how to write a professional resume, you might wanna evaluate yourself right this second. Or maybe just kill yourself please. You're turning out to be nothing more than a statistic, and nobody likes statistics. Anyway, I could also blame the availability of the jobs you really want to apply for, the job that you spent 4-5 years studying (questionable) for. Or maybe there  are, in fact, jobs available for you, but you just feel like you're way too special for the work description, or the salary, or the location of the building, or the uniform, or the ID laces, or the color of the walls, or maybe you're just a little bitch who complains about everything. It could be any of those. 

Pero kasi, merong mga tambay dati na nagpursige o nakaisip ng mga tamang desisyon sa buhay. Naimbis na bumili ng bumili ng mga sound system na tatak "Sunny" o "Pensonic", e inipon nalang sa bangko para sa isang investment. Alam kong madaling sabihin na magipon, at mahirap talagang magipon kung kakarampot lang ang sahod. Pero alam ko kasi na maluho talaga tayo e. Andami kong kakilala (sigurado ako madami ka ding kakilala) na puro reklamo na wala silang pera, pero bili naman nang bili ng pinaka bagong Iphone, o ng bag, o ng pang dota, o ng putang inang isang libong pisong pabango, na hindi ko talaga maintindihan kung ba't nya binili kung naghihirap daw sya. 

Simple lang, pag nakuha mo sweldo mo, MAGTABI KA NA AGAD NG IPON (kahit singkwenta o bente punyeta ka pinaiinit mo ulo ko), tapos kung ano ang natira, para na yun sa bills o expenditures mo. Kung may natira pa, pang luho mo na yun. Yun na yun. Kung natira sayo ay isang daang piso, bahala ka sa buhay mo. Ayan lang ang nakalaan sayo, yan na yun e. Tangina ngayon ka magsisi hindi ka nagaral ng maayos. Isisi mo din sa mga magulang mo kasi hindi sila nagplano ng naaayon sa lifestyle nyo bago ka pinanganak. Isisi mo sakanila na pinalaki ka sa ganyang "culture", sa bahala na system.

Pagod na pagod na si Batman kaka-resolba ng mga problema mo. Wag mo siyang sisihin kung palpak ka sa buhay mo ngayon at kung sa tingin mo hindi nararapat ang estado mo sa buhay ngayon. You are solely responsible for the shits you are experiencing right now. It all boils down to that decision you made in the past. The saying is true, no matter how obnoxious it sounds. There is always a choice (ok typing a fucking cliche makes me cringe so bad). But you really do have an option for everything. It doesn't necessarily mean that you're always handed good options, but options nonetheless. It could be deciding for whatever is the lesser evil, or maybe a decision that could be a turning point in your life. Tough decisions. Everyone has had to make a tough decision once or twice in their life. So don't be a bitch and accept that you made that choice, man up, and take responsibility. 

You're either the "Siya bahala, ako kawawa" or you're the "bahala na". Eitherway, you're making a mistake. Don't expect a lot if you let others decide for you. You decided to trust them with that decision after all. You are responsible as much as the person you entrusted your decisions with. Accept that. If you're the latter, then I really feel sorry for you, 'cos there is a huge possibility that the result could not be helpful to you. On the other hand, yes it could be positive, but do you really want to risk the outcome based on a half-assed decision?

Syempre eto ay para sa mga malalaking decision, kagaya ng pag-papaabort mo sa 2-week old sa tiyan mo, O kung gagamit ka ba ng condom, o kung magaaral ka ba para sa board exam, o kung iiwan mo na yung pamilya mo. O kung magpapalit ka na ng trabaho. Eto yung mga desisyong hindi dapat dinadaan sa "bahala na system". Busy si Batman kalabanin si Superman, pati ba naman pagpili kung Android o Apple sa kanya parin. 


Isa pa sa mga factor siguro kung ba't ang hirap masolusyunan yung unemployment sa Pilipinas ay ang "mañana" or "mamaya na" habit natin. Kasi aminin na natin, napaka-hirap talaga maghanap ng trabaho kasi ang hirap mag commute. Ang init init pa satin tapos obligado ka pang    mag-islong islivs. Ni-hindi ka makakapit sa Jeep kasi malalaman ni ati na jinajabar ka na. Ang hirap! Ang hirap hirap kumilos pag basa kilikili mo. Tipong bawal mag grey. Bale ang ending, mamaya nalang, bukas nalang, next month na, hanggang punyeta 27 ka na wala ka paring nararating.

Nakakatamad kasi talaga, lalo pa't andaming kelangan isipin bago magsimula. Pamasahe, oras ng pagcommute, pag gising ng umaga, pangkain mo, atbp. Pero kailan pa? Hindi naman mawawala yang mga hadlang na yan. Try mo lang one time. Baka kasi pwede ka namang mag baon ng damit, o matulog ng maaga para ok ka pag-gising mo at wala pang trapik. Baka naman may trabahong malapit sa inyo para di mo na kelangan mag commute pa Maynila, baka di ka lang talaga naghanap ng maayus (Yung maayos a! hindi yung nag google ka lang tapos kung ano lumabas un na. Tanga mageffort ka, kung kelangan mong bisitahin ung pang-36th na page bisitahin mo, batugan na to).

It also doesn't help when you've tried over and over again to apply for a job and still not able to get in. It lowers your confidence and it just fuels your desire to take a break instead. Maybe you can find something that motivates you while taking a break. Maybe one day you'll realize that you're almost running out of time, and you still haven't achieved  anything important yet. Time... the lack of time could be the best motivation in your case.

Filipino Time on the other hand is different from the usual definition of time. Epal tayo e, gusto natin me sarili tayong terms. Para bibo sa international community. Why? Why did we ever have to imbibe on that culture as a nation. Is poverty not enough? Is corruption too easy for us? Why do we not care about the one thing we can never be certain of. The one thing that should be treasured the most. The thing we can never take back. Well NOT me though, I'm not trying to be an ass here but I have always valued time even before I was a kid. My mom made sure of that. There are so many things I should thank my mom for, but the one thing I'm entirely grateful for, is that she taught us the value of time. Time management, punctuality, respect for other people's time, things I have cherished till today. 

The shitty part is that the term Filipino-time is actually well known among Filipinos, ex-pats and tourists alike. It is evident everywhere. Government offices, schools, events, meetings, trips, AIRPORTS... anything that requires punctuality, Filipino-time exists. 

Kahit sa tropahan. Laging merong isang tropa na laging late sa lakaran. Tipong siya lagi yung cause of delay. Bakit? Bakit niya naiisip na ok lang na antayin siya palagi? Kumbaga iniisip niya kaya na hindi importante ang oras ng mga kaibigan nya? Ang badtrip kasi dun, dahil ikaw sa sarili mo, ayaw mong pagantayin ung mga kasama mo, gigising ka ng umaga. Mageefort ka na maligo ng paspasan, kahit hindi ka ayus na ayus na gulogulo pa buhok mo, o hindi mo naisuot yung relo mo sa pagmamadali, ok lang, kasi mahalaga sayo ang oras ng iba. Dahil nagaalala ka na baka mainip ung tropa mo kakaintay. Na baka masira yung araw niya dahil sa dismaya sa kakuparan mo. 

The problem here is that because you guys are friends, it is usually just looked upon, and not taken seriously. It becomes a laughing matter every drinking session. But it is not a small issue. It shows how insensitive you are towards your friends, it shows immaturity and the lack of respect. Nevertheless, true friendship can withstand shits like this. You learn to forgive that person because it is just one negative trait. It doesn't outweigh the best things about that friend. At the end of the day, it is somehow, not a big deal. But it really doesn't hurt if you apologize every time you're late. You have to actually mean it and go out of your way to alleviate the situation. Maybe buy them a drink or a smoke. It doesn't matter, as long as they see you try at least.


Maybe we will never be able to get rid of any of these mentalities. Maybe it is part of who we are as a nation. But I refuse to believe that. That we will never be able to improve. Kasi naturuan kami ng nanay ko e. Hindi niya ipinakilala yung mga kulturang to. Kahit kailan hindi pumasok sa isipan kong maging tambay ng mahabang panahon. Kelangan mag trabaho at huwag i-asa ang kapalaran mo sa iba. O siguraduhing hindi ka late sa mga importanteng pangyayari sa buhay mo. Baka naman kelangan lang talaga magsimula sa bahay. Isisi mo talaga sa mga magulang mo yan. HAHA kasi isipin mo lang talaga, ba't ba nagkaganyan ka? Ba't ba nagkaganto tayong lahat? Tama ba sa tingin mo ang pagpapalaki sayo? Me naalala ka bang isang pangyayari nung bata ka na nagpabago ng pananaw mo?  Abangan sa susunod na kabanata ng "Perpekto ka e, Taena Walang Pores"