"Brieeee, Asan ka?"

I recently talked to a friend via Viber last night. She found out that her ex-boyfriend just got back from (insert country), and that makes her a little emo nostalgic. Before I go on, I did get her consent to write about her in this post. Although it really isn't just about her in totality, I just want her to be a specific in the general idea that i wanted to convey. Disclaimer pa more!  
I'm just gonna paint a picture of her a bit. She isn't someone who you can consider "stunning" in the conventional way. She isn't tall, and she doesn't exactly have the breasts or the ass to make up for it. What she has is true quality. She is your typical Filipina who has genuine love for her family. She is smart, funny and incredibly witty. She is a college graduate and was able to find a decent job right after college. That showed responsibility and independence. She is also a very sensitive person, yet knows when to be brutally honest. She loves her friends dearly and is truly concerned  about their well-being. These are the reasons why I can't figure out why she lacks the one thing that will make her stand out, self-esteem. Don't get me wrong, She is attractive, wala lang siyang boobs pero she could be very presentable if she tries.

Self-esteem, self-worth, o confidence para mas klaro. These traits should be the culmination of one's personality. You have to value yourself above others, coz only then can people see your worth. They will respect you for it and they will see that you're someone who should be taken care of. This goes out to everyone who's planning to be in a relationship, any relationship. Respect for oneself is paramount. Love is overrated, it is definitely important, but it will only do so much in a relationship.

Having said all these nonsense, Ikaw na tinutukoy ko, wag mong isipin na dahil wala kang karelasyon ngayon e bumaba na ang tingin ng mga tao sayo, o ang tingin mo sa sarili mo.
 Alam ko malaking factor din na iniwan ka niya sa mga hindi pagkakaunawaang natural lang naman sa isang relasyon, pero ganon talaga e. Minsan talo, minsan panalo. Imposible namang kahit isang bes hindi ka nanalo sa pinagsamahan niyo, sayo na nga nanggaling na parang nakabingwit ka ng malaking isda. Wag kang bastos uy, ayun na, nagimagine na ulit siya. 


Dapat mo ring maintindihan na hindi lang siya ang huling taong manloloko sa yo at mangiiwan sayo. Madami pa yan sila. Sa parehong paraang marami ka pa ring taong masasaktan sa mga desisyon mo sa buhay. Hindi ka espesyal, hindi siya espesyal, hindi ako espesyal. Walang exempted sa panloloko, o sa kahihiyan, o sa pag-e-emo. Lahat nakakaramdam ng hirap sa paghinga at panghihilo kapag inaalala mo yung mga katangahang nagawa mo nung nakaraan. Lahat ng tao me dinadalang hiya, pero hindi nangangahulugan na doon na iikot ang mundo mo, o ang basehan mo sa kahulugan ng pagsisismula muli.


You just have to say fuck it and move on. It's hard as fuck but what else can you do? It already happened and thinking about it over and over again will definitely NOT help. 

You have to accept the fact that he's moved on. And you should too. I know starting over again, trusting someone new, lowering your defense are the hardest parts of getting in a new relationship. Wondering if that person will accept your flaws, your deficits or your weaknesses, or maybe if he'll appreciate your strengths and your accomplishments. But that's the risk you have to take, and if you're not ready to accept that reality, then you probably need more time alone. More time to rethink your priorities in life. You are not getting any younger, I understand that, but you're life is going where it's supposed to be. You have a job, a home, you have your friends, you have the luxury of buying things that you like, you have things most people will never get the chance to have.

Matuto ka lang magpasalamat sa mga bagay na meron ka. Wag kang umasa na bida ka sa paborito mong teleserye. Isipin mo isa ka sa mga extra na napadaan sa likod ng paborito mong artista, malay mo mas masaya pala yung buhay niya kesa sa bida. Malay mo kontento siya sa mga bagay na meron siya ngayon. Higit sa lahat, sino bang nagsabing si Nadine Lustre lang ang pwede maging bida? Gumawa ka ng sarili mong storya. Wag mong ikumpara sa isang imahinasyon ng isang writer ng abs, o sa mga kaibigan mong nakahanap ng tamang "flow" sa buhay, o sa expectations mo nung mas bata at inosente ka pa. Hindi ka lang isang parte nang isang pagsasama. Higit ka pa sa inaakala mo. 

Uulitin ko, masasaktan ka ulit. I-expect mo na na iiyak ka ulit at magiging tanga ng paulit ulit. Lilipas din yan. At kung

pakiramdam mo nawawalan ka na ng pagasa, basahin mo nalang ulit to. Mejo kapagod sa Viber magmarunong e. 

Tapos na ha... balik sa bida ng blog.

Eto yung mga namimiss ko sa Pinas. Yung may mag tetext nalang sayo ng mga madaling araw na magaaya maginom dahil me problema sila. O nalulungkot sila.

Namiss kong maligo ng isang buhos lang ng tabo solb na, kasi excited ka nang makipaginuman at makinig sa drama ng tropa. An dali lang kasi, sakay ka lang tric, tapos jeep, tapos tambay sa 7/11 ng mga isang oras kasi late yung hinayupak mong tropa. Tapos pag nagkita kayo mawawala na yung galit mo kakaantay, kasi siya na ang bida. Ikaw na ang extra sa buhay niya. Ang papel mo ay makinig, at makinig lamang. Pwedeng gumatong ng me mura pang kasama, pwedeng magpayo pag hiningi nya. Pero makinig ka lang, dumamay ka lang, konting higop ng beer, kinig ulit, hanggang maiba na ang usapan. Doon mo malalaman na nakatulong ka na.